you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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