So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
