I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I'm just to the point my give a fucks is so far in the red that I'm going to have to take out a 30yr loan of fucks to repay it
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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