I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Randomize
