im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
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