i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
