so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
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