Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I think your dad took our porno
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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