I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
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