I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize