so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
