Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
