just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
you gave the police officer your chanel wallet and said 'just keep it the i.d. is fake too'.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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