I just called a phone sex line and you know what I did? I sat there and cried
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
