just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
