just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
