you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize