And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
even my farts smell like vagina
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I woke up in a cornfield to shouting, a bottle of Jim Beam, and a bunch of mc muffins. If this doesn't scream Illinois, idk what does.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
