This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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