I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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