how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
Randomize
