just come out here and I will go home with you...
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
