Joe is yelling at the trees again.
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
time to smoke my breakfast
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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