Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
Why are there so many empty soda cans in my room?
You put them in a circle around your bed and said it was the best way to ward of the witches from hocus pocus....then you remembered you needed salt too. I'm assuming you havent gone to the bathroom yet.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Randomize
