that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
