the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Randomize
