Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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