i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I just had sex on a roof
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
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