It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
Working nightshift means its never too early to start drinking- and you can quote me on that
Randomize
