My brain says no but my pants say off.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
