hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
We really shouldn't need this many nicknames for the women you've had sex with.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
