Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
Randomize
