Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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