Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
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