remember when you told me, jokingly, to not get jizz on your shirt that i borrowed last night?
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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