I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I think I'm destined to be the stoner version of one of those successful but emotionally unavailable characters Sandra Bullock always plays in movies
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
