I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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