return my video game
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
