Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
