Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
