so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Randomize
