Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
Randomize
