Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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