Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
Randomize
