This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i just google imaged poop.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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