there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
You brought string cheese to the strip club
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
Welcome to my Tuesday when my lesbian ex girlfriend shows up unexpectedly and gets me drunk and then leaves
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
