is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
i just like, need to vent to someone
Can we skip the part where I pretend to care and fast forward to the appreciative blowjob from you?
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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