shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
My contribution to the dinner party was a bottle of vodka and a bag of uncooked potatoes. I felt like a Russian serf.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
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