I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
Randomize
