another moral hangover. fuck.
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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