i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
When I left you were in the shower in your socks throwing up screaming it was blood but it was "ok" cuz it's recyclable. By the way it was kool aid.
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
Randomize
