How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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